There is a great new campaign out there, and you should know about it. BAN BOSSY.
My mom is putting posters up all over her classroom right now.
She's calling on her girls more in class. Usually girls don't voice their opinion because being opinionated is not a desirable attribute by society's standard, but that can change. Her desirable attributes aren't only in her bra size.
If our girls are going to be one day raising sons and daughters, than they too need to teach them to lead.
Girls have normally been taught to be oppressive, because it looks nicer, and they are valued for being nice. That's a wrong value system. We value them for standing up and doing the right thing, not for trying to control the feelings around them. They are capable of taking responsibility for all of the wrong they do and all of the right they do, let the image fall, let all of it go. Women have been taught to "protect" which may seem right, but can actually go the wrong way. Women usually don't do the right thing because they are trying to protect something or someone they love, therefore they feel justified. Now here comes my little Mormon slant.
You can be tough and tender. What may look tender can actually be cruel. You can be coarse and kind. One can do a lot of evil in the name of "Good Works." You can even be rude and refined. It is rude to stand by and not do the right thing. Because the only thing you do is weaken your own family, and enable the wrong person. You can have fame, fortune and be faithful. The size of your bank account is not an indicator of how faithful you are. You can be greedy and good. Is is good to want to work and build, therefore you can stabilize your own family, and bless the lives of others. You can be virtuous and be vain. An embrace of femininity is vain. One has to take care of themselves, but in doing so, you celebrate virtue. You can be pure and popular. When you are pure, you will attract the crowd that will rise to your standards, and that can become pretty popular. If you become popular, it should be for the right thing, not to become enslaved to the jewel of popularity, both inside and outside the church. The temptaion works both ways.
My mother has had an especiallly hard time getting the Mormon girls to speak up. One day she pulled one girl aside and asked her why she talked in a "toddler voice". The girl replied, "But Ms. Olsen, you know who my father is, and he told me if I talked like that I would scare all of the boys off and no one would want to marry me." The sad thing is she said it in the same toddler voice. My mom knows the well-known and connected "role-model" family. The girl is welcome to excel at a sport, but if she crosses the line of opinion, she'll un-nerve the men around her who pretend to be so tough.
What if we had said to Michael Jordan: Don't be so strong! Quit wanting it so bad! You're being a bully, bossy or a b***h. What if we had said those things? So why do we say it to our girls, when they have an opinion? Why is it okay if they silently play a sport but remain on the sidelines when it comes to controversial leadership?
Nobody says to the president, a male role thus far, "Stop making the economy work so well. Is is really hurting our feelings." Nobody devalues that job.
When Martha Stewart does a good job, she is openly criticized. Why? Both the White House and keeping your own home intact are important. We shouldn't devalue the role of the woman ever, no matter what she chooses
I want all of my children to know that I love what I do. My days are never a blur. I don't find them hard, boring, lonely or unfulfilled. This is the best kind of work there is, the most important kind of work.
I want my son to marry a girl who will challenge him every step of the way, not just hang out, be cool, be friends and marry him when marriage is convenient for him. I want someone who will make him feel uncomfortable and call him on his wrongs and not enable him.
Strong women mean strong households. The strength of a nation is in each household.
I say Ban Bossy!